I have ranted about annoying classmates in various posts throughout this blog, but I finally decided it was time to compile the mini rants into a comprehensive list that can be bookmarked for future reference. After exhaustive study, I have broken down the classmates who provoke an expression of displeasure* into key categories.**
1. The “Confuse myself with too much busy work, but I’m trying really hard” type. This type always misses the key point in any lecture. They try to make up for this by providing an excessive number of useless handouts to the class on a regular basis. Never give your number to said classmate. They will take advantage of your ability to pay attention in class.
2. The “Think I’m smarter then I am, so I will speak up the most in class” type. This type occasionally has the right answer, but more often than not just lends confusion to the class discussion. If you generally know the right answer and/or get better grades than this type, avoid them. They will only confuse you.
3. The “Yes, there is such a thing as a dumb question, and you just asked it” type. This type tries really, really hard. Sometimes in the midst of that trying, a dumb question just pops out. This person deserves your sympathy. Also, avoid them, just in case it’s contagious.
4. The “States the obvious in the most patronizing way possible” type. This type assumes they are better then you. They are not. Simply ignore them and hope that they go away. Alternately, politely point out when they are wrong in front of the class, while brilliantly answering the Professor’s question. This will definitely make them go away or hate you with an unmitigated passion. Either way, I’m drafting my senior year clinical rotation group—just as soon as I get someone in charge to sign off on it.
5. The “Thank you, Captain Obvious” type. This type is known for repeating well-known facts about the topic in question. They add nothing to the discussion, and would do well to stay silent. Be nice to this type. They tend to try hard, but have no real understanding of what they are missing/doing. Also, they provide the most humor in class, and give you the most fodder for your blog.
6. The “Sleep Through Class, but my grades rock” type. You should befriend this type. They may have mastered the art of learning via osmosis. And, their grades may be better then yours, so limit the smack talk.
*The original title of this post was “The Annoying Classmate,” but I decided to err on the side of political correctness.
**I reserve the right to update these categories as the need arises.
