June 4, 2012

Overheard

Same patient, male, with 3 nights of female nurses.

Night 1
Patient to nurse: Will you rub my feet? I only let certain nurses rub my feet.

Night 2
Patient: I need to see my nurse.
Me: Can she bring you anything?
Patient: I need a hug.

Night 3
Nurse: You need to wear this mask.
Patient: Why?
Nurse: Because it helps with your breathing.
Patient: If I stop breathing will you be the one giving me mouth-to-mouth?